Man, it’s funny how you think you’ve put the past behind you! Then something (just a small something) throws you right back into the past! When I married my last husband, way back in 1970, I was looking for something and someone who could make old hurts and heartaches go away! He seemed to be just what I had been searching for all my life. He had two children, I had one 4 years old. His wife had died from cancer. He needed me as much as I needed him. My first marriage had ended in divorce because I had married (unbeknown to me) a womanizer and a gambler!
But God gave me the most precious thing in my life, my son, whom, without, I couldn’t have made it six years! I didn’t want another try at marriage but one day a man came into the Restaurant who had recently lost his wife tragically to cancer! My heart went out to him because he was the saddest man! I started to make conversation with him by just asking him how he was doing, how was his day, etc. Then one day, months later, he brought his daughter, who was fifteen at the time, and his son, who was ten. We clicked immediately. His daughter was the sweetest girl in the world. His son held back because he was only 10 years old and was very close to his mother!
Well, to make a long story short, we were married a year later than his wife’s death! We got back in church right away and stayed there for 10 years, he as assistant Sunday school attendant, both as Sunday school teachers, and both in the choir. We had a seemingly American dream life. Oh! We had our share of ups and downs . Who doesn’t ? With three children, five years apart.
When the kids all were in school, I decided to go back to work in the Restaurant, because there just wasn’t as much to do and I was fidgety and lonely for my family! My husband didn’t like that much at the start! Everything seemed to be going along alright. But when we had been married ten years, the oldest was married and the middle boy was engaged.
I started noticing a definite change in him! Then people started telling me things about seeing his secretary sitting with him at ballgames. When I would ask him about it, he would laugh and tell me, she was just an employee! I believed him because of his integrity and his walk with the Lord!
I will not get into the ugliness that followed in the next year! Then he told me that he wasn’t satisfied with his life, that I was, but he wanted to be someone important. When I couldn’t stand the hurt and loneliness any longer, we separated! From that day on I had to live with “I saw your husband and his secretary such and such a place and they were holding hands”. I wonder if people understood what that did to me! But one day my Pastor Eugene Land asked me to pray and ask God to take away all the love I had for my husband and replace it with more love for HIM.
When I prayed that prayer the healing began. Kevin and I started a new life and we were there for each other, each step of the way! God saw I would be needing someone to help me through all this and he gave me the sweetest son in the world! His two children decided they needed their father more than they did their step mom! That hurt as bad as losing their daddy!
What started this blast from the past? My friend Juanita and I were in Shelby and just happened to be on the road that his business is on! He would NEVER let our kids have a dog, but there she (the secretary and his current wife) was, outside walking her dog around! The devil jumped on my shoulders and said “LOOK, SHE”S GOT A DOG!” I felt the heat starting along the roots of my hair! But you know what! The lord whispered to me and said “REBUKE YOU SATAN, FOR GREATER IS HE THAT IS IN ME, THAN HE THAT IS IN THE WORLD!!!! That’s all I have to remember! God has been with me through everything I have had to deal with in this old world and He will be there when he takes me home to Glory!
I praise him for my life now! I have scores of friends and lots of love from them and my family! I have a ministry of my own, helping to look after my friends here at K.M.Manor. We are all about the same age. Some are in good health and some aren’t ! But we try to look after each other! My son has found the love of his life! They live in St.Petersburg,Fla. and they are trying to get into the music industry! They love each other so much and I think they have found all they need in each other. One day you might see them singing and playing for God on T.V. or some big church! Who knows? We serve a great big GOD and He is GOOD!
I love this Peggy! It feels good to talk about these things that happen to us doesn’t it? I am so thankful for God’s Grace that helps all of us through these trying times. Big Hugs!!!
Peggy, what a wonderful testimony for the Lord. When the door on your husband was closed. Praise the Lord, the Lord opened a wonderful “window for you”. So many friends, so many people who love you. My life is similar. He showed me a verse one day, after my first husband left me for another woman, Isaiah 54: 5: “For thy maker is thine Husband…. the Lord of hosts is his name. .. and thy Redemer the Holy one of Isreal….”
I was crying that day, trying to find solace in God’s word….. and guess what he showed me This! What a comfort it was! Since then, I made some choices I know was not God’s choices, but He had plans for me…. I went with my plans, and much hurt and dismay was my life. But the children he blessed me with in my marriages, yes plural, I could never have hoped for so much joy. I never intended to be divorced, not from any of the three past marriages. I just chose the wrong men, who used me, abused me, and threw me and the children aside. Why I was drawn to them I will never know. They cheated on me, one was an alcoholic, one used me to help him get out of debt with his business, then cheated on me.
I raised my 4 daughters, basically on my own. I have been happily married to a good man for 10 years now…. a good family man. My daughters love him. I have a step son, step daughter, a grandson of mine, and a grandson and granddaughter of my husband’s. We both have jobs. I’m 59, he’s 60. I’m a nurse, he drives a propane truck. We have a nice home in semi-country, in Summerfield, NC. I go to church, he goes to golf course, although he is saved. My mother in law lives beside us. She’s 84, prefers to live alone, but we are nearby. My daughter, Shannon is 23, my youngest, she’s over there faithfully, looking after her needs, taking alot of the stress off of me. I am so thankful for her. and I love my mother-in law, too.
I work in a skilled and long term facility in Pleasant Garden, NC. I love my job, but it can sometimes get stressful. Working full time there and taking care of elderly next door was really taking its toll. So my daughter stepped in next door, and she has a wonderful relationship with my mother in law. She’s closer to her than her own grandchildren. Anyway, didn’t mean to ramble on. There’s always a plan a, b, c & d. That’s because when Jesus saves us, he never lets go. He gives us a free will, to make our own choices. I’ve finally learned to go with his choices, not mine. and my life is happier for it. Praise the Lord. Glad to be friends with you Peggy. I’ve been praying you will feel better. I know you haven’t felt well lately. May the lord bless you, my dear sister-in-christ.
Luv you.!… Betty